


Rikki Isn't Real Ithro You Idiot

by angryAsexual



Category: LazyTown
Genre: Glanni being manipulative and mean, M/M, Rating May Change, Rikki Riki - Freeform, Tags to be added Maybe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2019-04-17 23:10:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14199675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angryAsexual/pseuds/angryAsexual
Summary: On a whim, Íþróttaálfurinn decides to go back to LazyTown after working in BullyTown for a bit. There, he meets a handsome stranger that isn't at all what he seems.--Some people wanted an Ithro x Rikki fic so I'm trying my hand at one.





	1. Chapter 1

It was out of instinct that Íþróttaálfurinn returned to LazyTown. The elven hero wasn’t completely sure what drove him to it. He had no sense of incoming danger, no apprehension about leaving the town on its own for a few days. But he still felt the nagging urge to return. And so he boarded his hot air balloon and made the journey back as quickly as possible, spurring the aircraft on with short bursts of magic. As he neared the town Íþróttaálfurinn felt himself begin to relax. There was no trouble; his crystal remained silent and still as could be, dangling from the tip of his cap and resting gently against the side of his head. Still, he removed his telescope to better scan the area beneath him. 

He noticed a crowd of people gathered outside the town hall and his pointed ears perked up slightly. He twisted a part of the telescope and zoomed in carefully. It wasn’t unusual for the townsfolk to gather like this, but he still wanted to make sure it wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. He made a small noise of surprise as he spied an unfamiliar clad in vibrant pink standing before the crowd, gesticulating excitedly and seeming to awe the people of LazyTown. Curious, the hero brought himself down towards the town square with practiced ease and maneuvered the balloon to land beside the gathered crowd. As he came nearer he could see how much the townsfolk seemed to love the stranger, and it brought a smile to his face. 

As he descended the crowd noticed him and an excited cry of his name rose up from them. Their friend waved merrily to them and they clustered towards the area Íþróttaálfurinn would land. He grabbed a rope for an anchor and executed a quick flip to jump out of his balloon, landing neatly on the ground and tying it to a column of the town hall. The crowd eagerly bustled up to him, happily greeting their friend and hero who was blushing faintly at all the attention.  
“Hello my dear friends!” He called out in his light, playful voice. “I am sorry to have interrupted what looks to be an exciting town meeting!” He paused to look from the townspeople to the stranger, and his heart skipped a beat. 

The stranger was a tall, elegant looking man with lovely yet striking features; a pointed chin, sharp cheekbones, and gentle grey eyes that seemed to sparkle with merriment. They were accented with shimmery pink eyeshadow that matched the soft pink of his full lips. Sleek black hair was covered by a large maroon hat and he was draped in a large, hot pink coat that matched silky pink bell bottoms. The coat was decorated with sequins that twinkled playfully at him and made it impossible for the elf to look away. The only word Íþró could think of to accurately describe the stranger’s beauty was _magical_. Íþróttaálfurinn felt his delicate blush spread to his ears as the stranger met his gaze with a curious and faintly amused expression. Had he met the stranger’s eyes a few seconds sooner, however; the elf would have seen fear in those beautiful grey eyes of his. But Glanni Glæpur knew better than to be afraid. Yes, the hero was strong, but what was strength in the face of cunning and trickery? And Glanni, of course, was the master of disguise. While clothing alone did little to hide his identity Glanni also worked a bit of magic to help alter his appearance. Literally. His glamour, while it couldn’t alter all his features, hid enough to make him unrecognizable as…well, himself. It softened his face, made him look friendlier and more approachable. Younger, too. It gave him the face of someone that could be trusted. 

Glanni-or Rikki, now-slid a charming smile onto his face and sauntered up to the elf. His high heels clicked softly on the pavement of the town square, and he extended his hand for a shake. Íþróttaálfurinn smiled broadly and clasped Rikki’s soft hand in his own calloused one, shaking it eagerly. Now that the other man was closer, the elf could see he was much taller than himself even without the heels. Íþró had to tilt his head back slightly to look into Rikki’s beautiful grey eyes.

“Why hello, stranger,” he purred, giving Íþró’s hand a gentle squeeze. Glancing down briefly the elf noticed the stranger’s nails were painted black. But something had been added to the polish to give his nails a light pink shimmer. He quickly looked back up at the stranger and his heart leapt as his smile grew. “I am the one and only Rikki Riki! And I must say, it’s quite an honor to meet such what seems to be an esteemed hero. Tell me, sweetheart, what is your name?”

It took Íþró a moment to find his words. Rikki’s voice was soft as silk and seemed to pull the elf closer to him. He cleared his throat when he got his voice back and confidently stated, “Íþróttaálfurinn. Tell me, Mr. Riki, what has brought you into town?”

“Please, call me Rikki,” he replied with a playful wink. “I have come to see this _wonderful_ town as my good friend the president has told me much about it! It has been far too long since I’ve had a good vacation, always helping him you know, and he urged me to take some time for myself. I so often give him advice but now it was his turn to give me some, and I see I was right to take it. Never have I seen a cleaner, healthier, and active-er town than LazyTown!” He was pleased to see Íþróttaálfurinn’s chest swell with pride as he expertly wove his web of lies, trapping the foolish elf with ease. “And what luck! The same day I ride in I am greeted by none other than the handsomest man I’ve ever seen~” That part was at least partially true. Glanni thought Íþró was just as handsome as he was foolish.

Íþróttaálfurin’s blush deepened further as he chuckled shyly. “Rikki, you flatter me. I am no better than any other sports elf,” he exclaimed, which earned him another heart melting smile from Rikki. A smile that really did make him feel like a hero. But before either man could speak again, the pink-haired Solla spoke up excitedly.

“Íþróttaálfurinn is the hero that inspired us to be cleaner, healthier, and active-er!” she exclaimed. Íþró felt himself grow strangely embarrassed as the other townspeople voiced their praise, gushing over the changes he had brought to the town. Rikki giggled softly and took another step closer to Íþróttaálfurinn.

“So not only are you handsome, but you’re a hero too?” He asked in that same charming silky voice that already sent shivers down Íþró’s spine. The elf gave a bashful smile before speaking.

“Yes, I am a hero. And proud to be one! Especially since it has led me to meeting you.”

Rikki seemed shocked by the statement, and Íþró suddenly wished he could take it back. Perhaps he had been too forward with him, misreading Rikki’s tone as flirtatious. But before he could say anything again Rikki simply laughed, sidling up close to throw an arm around the elf’s shoulders. Íþró felt like he could just die from the blissful contact.  
“What a smooth talker you are, Íþróttaálfurinn,” he purred and the elf felt relief wash over him. “Perhaps you can tell me about your heroic escapades over dinner sometime, hm?”

The sentence was punctuated by a wink and Íþróttaálfurinn’s heart soared higher than his balloon could ever take him. ”Yes!! I mean—yes, of course. I would be delighted, Rikki Riki!”

Rikki gave him another smile before Íþróttaalfurinn excused himself under the guise of needing to get his balloon to it’s proper place while he stayed in town. He did his “signature move” before completing an overly complicated series of backflips (totally not so he could show off for Rikki) and landing perfectly in the center of his basket. He waved happily to the townsfolk that happily shouted their goodbyes as the balloon lifted off, taking a moment to look back at Rikki. With the people of LazyTown distracted he was now smirking up at the elf, seductively licking his lips before turning and walking off with an enticing sway in his hips. Gods, Íþróttaalfurinn couldn’t wait to see this handsome, charming, sexy stranger again.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Íþró visits Rikki briefly, and Glanni has doubts about his plan.

Glanni sighed as he shut the door to his expensive hotel room, settling his cane against the wall beside it and sweeping his hat off with a flourish. He stepped further inside and slowly looked around to take in the lavish decorations with a grin. Oh, this was _lovely_. It was more like a comfortable apartment than a hotel room, and a very luxurious one at that. It had a nice little kitchen area, a ‘living room’ complete with a cozy-looking couch, two armchairs, and a large TV, and a closed-off room he assumed was the bedroom with the bathroom attached to it. The criminal opened the bedroom door and strode inside, removing his garish coat and tossing it carelessly off to a random corner before flopping onto the wonderfully soft bed with a delighted little evil giggle. The swiftness in which he got the townspeople to believe his lies was almost sad. Usually Glanni had to actually make an effort at convincing the victims of his schemes, but the LazyTowners immediately ate his bullshit right up and even seemed hungry for more. All it took was some smooth talking and a bit of glamour to make himself look more “trustworthy.” He couldn’t believe his luck. And to make things even better, he managed to trick the town’s beloved hero!

Thinking about the heart eyes he got from the elf brought a cruel smile to Glanni’s face, and another giggle bubbled up from inside him. “Oh, what an _idiot!_ ” he cried to himself, before full on cackling at the poor hero’s expense. With the hero crushing so hard on his Rikki persona, Glanni’s plan would go even smoother than he ever dared hope. And to top it off, he’d probably be able to get a few free meals out of it by letting the elf take him to dinner.

Speaking of which, _he_ had offered to take the elf to dinner soon. Glanni would have to plan that, it wouldn’t be a good idea to just blow the Hero off. He doubted he could come up with a good enough excuse. The criminal groaned, rubbing his face as he swore. “Alright don’t worry, it’ll be easy. Just take the oaf to someplace nice for dinner and…flirt a little,” he mumbled in an attempt to reassure himself, now scowling. Glanni just had to remember that this would be worth it in the end. He would distract the elf with Rikki’s charms, making him lower his defenses and grow less observant as his allies snuck into the city, and seduce him in an attempt to get the elf to trust Rikki further. Thankfully, he had years of experience using romance and sex to get people to give him what he wanted. Yes, it would all work out in the end. Glanni had pulled off riskier stunts in the past anyways.

His thought process was interrupted by a sudden knock at the door. Growling lightly at the interruption, the criminal sat back up and got to his feet. Snapping his fingers to send his cane flying into one hand and Rikki’s hat into another he wondered who had the nerve to bother him so late in the day. It was nearly sunset, and he had things to do! With one last angry huff he walked to the door he put up his glamour once again, identity perfectly concealed. Looking out the peep hole he was surprised to see Íþró, bouncing on the balls of his feet.

Íþróttaálfurinn was in the hallway outside Rikki’s door, nervous energy filling his body as he fought off the urge to drop down and start doing pushups, or sit ups, or maybe even jumping jacks to calm himself down. He had tied his balloon off in its usual place just outside Town Hall when he figured he ought to ask Rikki about details of their date. After all, he wanted to know how he should get prepared. And...well, maybe he just wanted to see the enchanting stranger one last time before heading to bed. But as Rikki took what felt like an unusual amount of time answering the door Íþró worried that perhaps the other didn’t really want to see him after all. Feeling disappointed the elf started to turn away to leave, but immediately froze in place when the door opened.

Rikki stood in the doorway, leaning on his cane with his hat tilted slightly. His bright pink coat was draped over a tightly-fitting black leather catsuit, which did very little to hide Rikki’s curves. Íþró hastily brought his gaze up from Rikki’s body to his eyes as he felt his face heat up in a blush.

“Ah, he-hello!” he said in a tone he hoped hid how nervous he was. He flashed Rikki a blindingly bright smile and the tall man seemed unable to keep himself from smiling right back. The gentle, endearing expression on his pale face convinced Íþró to keep going. “Sorry for bothering you, Rikki, but I realized that I didn’t know when we’d be going on our date. I-I just wanted to make sure I have time to prepare!”

Rikki giggled, the sound bright and bubbly and reminding Íþró of sweet champagne. “You could _never_ bother me, sweet thing. But this is entirely my fault! I should have given you the time and date right away. I _do_ hope I didn’t cause you too much worry.”

Íþró hastily laid a reassuring hand on Rikki’s shoulder as the taller of the two looked worried, biting his lower lip as his eyebrows knit together. “Not at all, my friend! I—well.” Íþró cleared his throat nervously as his blush spread to the hidden tips of his ears. “It is not that bad of a mistake to have made. After all, it gave me an excuse to see you.”

Rikki seemed reassured by this, his charming smile taking the place of his worried expression. “Oh, aren’t _you_ a sweet talker,” Rikki cooed, reaching up with a well-manicured hand to gently stroke Íþró’s cheek. The contact had Íþró leaning closer to Rikki, wordlessly asking for more. And Rikki was happy to oblige, stepping forward to cup Íþró’s cheek as his beautiful smile slid back onto his face. “Seeing as how impatient you are and how eager to get to know you I am, how about we schedule our date for tomorrow? I’m sure I can find us a place to eat good enough for the famous, beloved hero of LazyTown!”

Íþró couldn’t help but laugh, placing a hand over Rikki’s as he grinned. “I would be happy doing anything with you Rikki, even just going for a simple picnic in the park. Actually...that would…maybe be less of an inconvenience than going to a fancy restaurant…”

“Inconvenience?”

“Well—being an elf, I cannot eat heavily processed food. Or any sugar that isn’t natural. I…I’d get sick, or have a sugar meltdown,” he explained, hoping his dietary restrictions wouldn’t make Rikki loose interest. But thankfully, they didn’t. The man simply chuckled.

“Well, we can’t have that. I’d hate for our first date to end in such tragedy. A picnic sounds wonderful! How does…around five sound?” He suggested, and Íþró nodded eagerly. It made the crystal on the end of his hat bounce slightly, as if it were excited for the date too. Rikki’s eyes slid to it and curiosity made its way into his sterling silver eyes. His hand moved from Íþró’s cheek to the ornament as if to touch it. Out of instinct Íþró quickly pulled away, cupping a hand almost defensively over it and thoroughly shocking Rikki.

“Forgive me! I—well. A Hero’s crystal is their most important possession, and we prefer it if others do not touch them,” he explained. Rikki’s confusion turned to understanding and he opened his mouth, an apology on his lips. “But do not worry, you simply didn’t know. And now you do! I would be happy to tell you more about-about being a Hero, if you would like.” He had seen a gleam of interest in Rikki’s eyes, and it made Íþró hope he could impress the elegant-yet-gaudy man by telling him all about his life as a Hero. Another chuckle came from Rikki, causing Íþró to smile uncontrollably.

God, Rikki’s laughreally _was_ lovely.

The sudden sound of dogs barking could be heard outside the hotel room and Rikki turned to look at the window with a soft gasp as he saw the sun was beginning to set. “Oh I would absolutely love to hear more about it sweetheart. But it's getting late, and I really _am_ quite tired from my journey. But we will have all of tomorrow evening to get to know each other. And…perhaps the night, as well?”

There was just the faintest suggestive tone in Rikki’s voice, flustering Íþró. He got himself together enough to answer quickly. “Yes, of-of course! Plenty of time. I would hate to risk you not getting enough sleep, so I will go. It is nearing my own bedtime, too!” he added. Rikki smiled once again. And he shocked Íþró by taking one more step forward, bridging the distance between them to press soft, surprisingly cool lips to Íþró’s cheek before stepping back.

Now it was Rikki’s turn to blush as he examined the bright pink kiss mark he had left on Íþró’s cheek, a playful smile on his face. “I can’t wait to see you again tomorrow, my sweet. Sleep well,” he purred. 

Íþró nodded dumbly, eyes wide as he looked up at Rikki who gave him one last loving smile. “Goodnight, Rikki!!” he cried out, a bit too loud. Rikki giggled, wiggling his fingers in a wave goodbye. Íþró excitedly waved back before doing a series of flips and cartwheels down the hall, feeling as if he’d simply burst with excitement if he didn’t move. Rikki had _kissed him!_ Sure it was only on the cheek, but it still filled the elf with pure bliss. He wished he had a mirror so he could examine the mark it left behind but knew he’d have to be content with the knowledge that it was there.

His departure was watched by Glanni, who felt a wave of exhaustion crash over him just by _watching_ the stupid elf flip away, giving one last excited wave before turning down the corner. Glanni managed to keep his radiant smile right up until he closed the door. The second he was hidden away from the world once more he let out a weary groan and sagged a little before walking back towards the bedroom. Flirting came easily to him. So did seduction. And more than once did he use both skills to get his way, to take advantage of people. Never had he felt guilty about it—in fact, usually he was just amused by how easily people could be manipulated with promises of intimacy. But for some reason this felt different. Maybe because Íþró was an elf, and Glanni simply didn’t deal with them frequently. Or maybe it was because the Hero was just so… _trusting_. He felt that it was a bad quality for a Hero to have, anyone could take advantage of them that way and that was a dangerous thing to have happen to a Hero. But it worked in his favor, so Glanni shouldn’t complain.

Still…something felt wrong about this. Maybe it was the way Íþróttaálfurinn looked at him, sparkling brown eyes so filled with trust and…maybe even admiration? He was so open, so honest about how he felt. It was difficult for even elves to lie to faeries; they had a powerful sort of intuition about that kind of thing, and every word Íþró said, every dopey smile he gave Glanni, was completely heartfelt. He really _was_ excited for their date, he really _did_ want “Rikki” to like him…it was almost sad. 

But Glanni couldn’t let it bother him. The sun was setting, and it was time to meet up with the MayhemTown Gang and discuss their plan once more before beginning to put it into action. He shut the blinds and put up a few wards to keep people from wanting to check up on him—once they got to his door they’d realize that ‘shit it’s late, better let Rikki sleep’ and promptly turn away. With all his safety precautions in place Glanni happily stripped out of his Rikki costume and practically purred at the feeling of just being in his catsuit. Wearing disguises and tricking people was great fun for the faerie, but he loved simply being _Glanni_ , feared criminal and villainous mastermind. That, and Rikki’s coat was a little bit too warm. Freed from the shockingly pink clothes he walked quietly over to the window, peering outside from between a gap in the blinds, and strengthened his glamour. All people would see is the faintest hint of a shadow slip out the window and around the back of a hotel, though if they looked close they may catch a pair of vibrant pink eyes staring out from its inky depths. But there was no one around to see it, and Glanni easily made his way, undisturbed, through LazyTown.


End file.
